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SPIRIT
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Spiritual
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FEARING POWER &
MEDICINE
By CinnamonMoon
It is common for students of any
tradition to experience fear of what they are getting into.
What
will interaction with one’s Totems be like? What will I
do when I tap into the Source Energy of
Creator? What happens when you touch an elemental force? What’s
it like? How do I control it?
Suddenly our mind is swimming with questions we can’t answer
for ourselves and the fears of
the unknown “out there” and “within us”
begin to build. We allow those fears to take hold
because we don’t know what else to do and before we know
it we create quite the roadblock for
ourselves. Since this is common, and in talking with a friend
the other day regarding something
along these lines, I’ve felt an article brewing itself.
I hope it helps some of you in your own processing.
When fear begins to rise up within us there are many different
symptoms that we don’t always
recognize at first so that we can name our false evidence that
appears to be so real. It rather
sneaks up on us as other symptomatic feelings we do name, symptoms
like: disliking the feeling
of an energy. We don’t see it as fear, we see it as dislike.
We may feel threatened by the intense
power of a Spirit Helper or Totem, and that threat is seen as
distasteful or overpowering and we
see it as a rejection rather than a fear. Sometimes we do recognize
our own fears as fear of the
Power itself (whatever its source); of the Medicine we have
within us (due to lack of knowledge
to control it); fear that we might misuse our abilities or knowledge
leading to non-use; and so
fear weakens our progress.
To overcome the fear we must turn it into a strength by recognizing
we need to adjust our
thinking and perspectives so we can embrace our lessons. In
doing so we find we can work
through matters and step out of our comfort zone to understand
through these experiences how to
control our use of knowledge, energy, and power. We have to
hunt the knowledge in this sense,
and in that establish our ethics. Basically all energy and power
that comes from the spiritual
knowledge we hold is neutral, it is activated by our use or
intentions, and so it is we who
determine whether it’s utilized in positive or negative
ways. But what about the intentions of
others and how their Medicine or Power or Knowledge are being
used or presented to us…how
do we know their intentions are good?
It seems to be the answer to that comes from learning to trust
our own sensory perceptions, but to
do that we have to learn to separate our fears from what we’re
really picking up on. Let me give
some examples of how these experiences can present themselves
and through those perhaps
you’ll recognize some experiences of your own and how you
reacted to them. Experience is
really one of our greatest teachers isn’t it? Let’s
say you’re being exposed to a new Totem, a Big
Cat (You can imagine any one of them that you like). It’s
in the nature of the Big Cats (any cat
for that matter) to be curious about approaching someone they
don’t know, so they are going to
size us up. In doing so they approach often quietly, lurking
in the shadows, just out of sight
though we may catch a glimpse of movement now and then, they
are stalking us and we can feel
it. That unseen presence can give rise to discomforting feelings,
we can’t see what it is, can’t
locate where it is, but it’s there all the same, those
eyes are on us and we know it deep inside. We
feel the stalking, and fears begin to rise up telling us something
or someone is hunting us. Oh no,
now what do we do? It doesn’t feel safe in this new territory
we’ve begun to explore and it’s
unfamiliar ground so now we have more fears coming into play.
Unrecognized mirroring is beginning to take place, because this
new Totem directly reflects our
own traits back to us. The Power and Medicine of this animal
resides within us as well and
triggers (through it’s very presence) a sense of that power.
Our spirit recognizes it and tries to
name it. The conscious mind is aware it’s there but is
confused at first and we run from the
Power…and essentially we run from ourselves as we end up
chasing our own tail. We can’t get
away from “it” because “it” is part of who
we are. Now our Totem that is introducing itself
knows this, that’s why it stalks us, it waits to present
itself fully until we settle our fears. It’s
going to approach us very cautiously, revealing itself a little
at a time so we can accept it. But
being fearful we see that quiet stalking approach as something
negative (our perception rather
than the intent of the Totem) rather than positive.
In other instances our Totems may be learning to approach the
human they are to serve and may
make mistakes of their own, or have a bolder presence about
them where they simply show
themselves boldly. I have a friend who was being introduced
to Bear, he appeared before her as
an adult, standing up on his hind legs and looking her in the
eye. She was terrified and ran away.
The next time he appeared he came to her as cub she could accept.
She was doing journeywork
to connect with him and in her journey they stood outside a
tavern, she saw the cub and decided
to go into the tavern and order a drink. Sitting at the bar,
the Bear Cub followed her in the door
and got up on the stool next to her, shifted back to the adult
image, smiled and offered to buy her
a drink. She thought that so funny that she burst out laughing,
the Bear laughed with her, and the
laughter shattered the fear. They’ve been fast friends
ever since.
Whatever the manner of approach and however strange it may seem,
there is often a sense of
danger attached to our initiating to the Totems. We see them
as physical creatures in spiritual
form and we attribute that physical nature, the wild primal
aspects, to them. What we feel
through the stalking is that hunted sensation and in reality
we are the Hunter, hunting our own
energy potential in getting to know who our Totems are and what
they are there to teach us. In
Recognizing who they are another new fear begins to arise. If
this is part of our nature (again still
locked into the primal image of what these creatures can do
to us as predatory animals), then
what is the potential threat from them and what is our potential
threat to others? Will we misuse
or abuse that Power? If we fear we will it can lead to non-use
until we learn to use it properly.
We have to assimilate how it fits into our nature, find where
we can recognize it, and learn to use
it through finding our center of balance. It’s a long way
from the introduction to that point of
understanding though.
If we succumb to the misuse and corrupt path with the negative
or contrary side of the Medicine
we then enter into lessons that bring on hard and harsh experiences.
Through fear we enter into
denial or refusal to accept the Power before we can truly understand
it or experience it through
the instruction these creature-teachers offer us. It feels like
a powerful threat then and we may
tend to run away. The fight or flight syndrome kicks in and
we see these predatory spirits as
greater than ourselves so we tend to flee rather than fight.
We feel the need to guard against it
when just the opposite is true, what we really need to do is
get to know them.
If we apply impulsive use of Power it leads to trouble and lessons
in temperance. Once the
Power is understood it is used less and less. We come to see
that we only call upon it when it’s
needed and we don’t show off with it. Power does not have
intent, it is the build up of energy
without a will of its own. It follows our will as we direct
it; in other words, born of love or hate,
as the impetus of these intentions are two sides of the same
coin…both balanced in the extremes
of their nature, as strongly as we love we mirror our capacity
to hate and so balance is called for.
If you do not learn to balance your nature and control your
Power (just as you control yourself in
daily life) it will use you. If you know how to delve into Self
and know your Self you know how
to apply control of Power and use it properly.
Who you are and who you strive to be determines Power use for
benefit of others or the contrary
powerlust and abuse to control others. If you’re by nature
a good person you have no need to fear
the use of your abilities and the energies you “run”
through yourself. Only the need to
understand them is required so you can learn to control that
flow. The same self-control that you
always use will be applied in spiritual pathwork too. If you
respect yourself you’ll respect others.
If you walk your talk and wield your abilities with honor you
will have nothing to fear. Ignore
that and the backlash will surely come. So we have to understand
the contrary side of our
Medicine or the Medicine of the Totems we work with, the energy
we summon, to avoid the
misuse. It comes from experience, and initially cautious observation
is called for.
Fear blocks us from embracing the lessons with conscious awareness
and forces us to learn by
experience which is often the hard way. Let’s say this
new Big Cat Totem comes to you and you
have that hunted feeling. They are stalking you in the sense
of wanting to see if you spot them.
(What level is your awareness on?) They are drawing sensations
of this ability out of you. It’s
there, in your nature already, and they are helping to bring
it to the surface. Unrecognized, you
feel fear, threat, and begin to stalk the danger. You start
to look for what’s moving in the
shadows and start to stalk your Self. Experience here leads
you through the fear to see you were
in essence stalking that aspect of yourself and learning the
Power anyway. While you may have
been blindly learning this lesson there comes a point of recognition:
“Ah-ha! I’ve been chasing
my own tail! I’ve been afraid of myself, not my Totem!”
You see, we all have a Shadow side to our nature, we know we
can do some negative things,
things we need to keep under control. Perhaps we’ve done
things that we are now ashamed of,
feel we acted impulsively, things we feel guilty for, things
we have vowed to ourselves to never
do again. In this sense there is often an encapsulation or imprisonment
of that aspect of our
nature. We keep it on a very tight leash, take control of our
Self, so we don’t unleash that power.
We’ve experienced something relative to the contrary aspect
of one of our totemic aspects. We
fear our own Shadow. In that aversion to recognize and confront
it, the Shadow side becomes
part of our lesson and somehow tied to that experience as we
pass through it. It’s better to be
willing to enter the lesson than to be dragged (like the prey
of a predatory animal) kicking and
screaming into it but we all do that from time to time.
Comfort zones are another area that often blocks us. We fear
facing the unknown inside us or
outside that comfort zone so we stay where we’re comfortable,
where we feel we’re in control.
The trouble is we can’t grow beyond that ‘zone’
all we can accomplish there is the same things
we’ve done up until that point. Basically, if we continue
to stay there, doing the same old things
we’re going to get the same old results. If we want to
grow and expand ourselves beyond that we
have to step out of the box we’ve kept ourselves in. It’s
sort of like being a potted plant and
getting rootbound. You need to expand beyond that known territory
and let yourself explore new ground.
Knowing the Shadow within yourself allows you to keep it in
manageable restraint as you learn
self-control. Because you choose not to allow it to control
you it cannot take control. The new
Power manifesting through recognition when a new Totem appears
(or when we learn any new
method of weaving energy) teaches us the way to gain control.
We always learn on the level of
Self first….we are our own practice arena and the greatest
battles we fight are going to be with
our Self. If we master our Self we master our Power. If we master
our Power the fear of it vanishes.
As I’ve stated, the Power that our Medicine or Totems bring
to bear in our lessons is already
within us. They reflect it, they teach us to use it (contrary
and positive use which both serve
purposes at different times), they teach us to see it within
ourselves in the first place. We so often
take this aspect of our nature for granted as it is there to
begin with…it’s part of who we are so
much so that we don’t define it as a trait, it just ‘is’
and we tend to overlook it as a significant
aspect of our strength. So when the lessons arrive we have to
see the connection for ourselves.
It’s time to learn to use that ability. Whether that lesson
comes from the intense forces of Nature
or a Totem with a deadly predatory creature-teacher, we must
learn constraint and the extremes
of the Power can be very intimidating at first.
But! A car can be a deadly predator too can’t it? Yet we
learn to drive with that in mind---using
its power wisely as needed and control is achieved that we may
apply our skill respectfully. We
keep the power of the car under control until there is need
to increase its use, until there’s a need
to give it more gas. Medicine, the elemental forces of Nature,
the Totems and the Powers they
bring to us in support of our development and filling our needs
as well as the needs of others, the
mighty Source Energy that is available to all of us…these
are no different than the cars we drive
or need to learn to drive.
I was recently discussing Power with a friend and that brought
out this article as I’ve mentioned.
In our conversation I used myself as an example saying: “What
I *can* do with my ability would
allow me to abuse or intrude with my Power, sure. But will I?
Not without a darned good reason
and it would be called for only in regards to self-protection
from someone meaning me harm—
survival. Otherwise it would be used to observe and get to know
someone for who they are, not
to interfere. Knowing me as a person, you can know how I use
my Power. I know the
repercussions of misuse—I’ve seen plenty of that over
the years, and I can tell you I want no part
of such behavior. Knowing what I’m capable of in my Shadow
nature allows me to control my
Power—not fear it. I will not unleash it carelessly, nor
will I use it carelessly. It seems the more
you learn the less you use it because you are only willing to
call upon it when the need is great.
You’ll try everything else first. It’s used as a last
resort or in case of emergency.” I should add I
would use it to protect those close to me who are in need and
incapable of helping themselves. If
there is time in the given situation to teach them to protect
themselves with their own ability I
would opt for that instead.
Many of our totems will contain primal energy—aggressive
and assertive—instinctual—survival
of the fittest. But…tempered with higher conscious awareness
and spiritual understanding the
cardinal law of the universe says the primal nature will be
tamed. There’s nothing to fear then.
This is true for the forces of Nature we encounter with the
elements, the Spirits of Place at
different locations, our Spirit Helpers in any form they may
take, our Guides, Source Energy in
all it’s guises. So do not fear the Power or the Energy
or the Totems or Spirits, honor them,
honor yourself, move forward observing with sensible caution
until you understand more, but
don’t fear it. Learn about it instead.
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Libraries
are on this row
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INDEX
Page 3
(Main Section, Medicine Wheel, Native Languages &
Nations, Symbology)
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INDEX
Page 5
(Sacred Feminine & Masculine, Stones & Minerals)
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Text:
© Copyright: Cinnamon Moon & River WildFire Moon
(Founders.) 2000-date
All rights reserved.
Site
constructed by Dragonfly
Dezignz 1998-date
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