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SPIRIT
LODGE
LIBRARY
Spiritual
Development
Page
30
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Some of the links for the 97 pages in this Spiritual Development
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GROUNDING AND CENTERING
WITH A TODDLER AGE 1-3
© Mouse, 2004
At conception of a child, mother's
energies and the embryo's energies act as one. Mother's
energies interact with the embryo/fetus, and it's done as good
as unconsciously. Once the baby is
born, the energetic separation also starts, as baby's energies
grow stronger under the protective
and nurturing cloak of the mother. But they are still a unit,
one's energy still dependent on the
energy of the other, until a child has more or less the basic
information about survival in this
world. When they are able to get themselves a bowl of food after
sensing that they are hungry,
when they can pour themselves a drink when they sense they are
thirsty, when they can use the
bathroom upon sensing they need to pee or poop, when they can
communicate verbally with
others at a basic level about their needs, and when they are
physically able to remove themselves
from, or enter into a situation. They are then no longer immediately
physically dependent on the
connection with their mother. Of course, the connection between
mother and her child is never
entirely severed, since her body and spirit are physically,
emotionally and spiritually invested in
the child.
So from this premise, a toddler is still energetically attached
to the mother, and not yet able to
actively center and ground energies that have been accumulated
throughout the day. External
stimulation is overwhelming. Imagine standing in a foreign city,
with your eyes closed. You are
bombarded with sensory input: the foreign voices, smells, music,
the energy is different since it
is a different culture… you are not familiar with the customs
or its finer details at the very
least… and you will need to have a space in which you can
just come back to yourself again and
let it all sink in, and to relax from all the (extra) sensory
alertness. Same goes for a toddler: their
world is increasingly growing, their new-found ability to walk
brings a lot more in range for
them, and allows them to pursue their new objects or places
of interest. It also means that the
toddler is confronted with the fact that (s)he and the mother
are NOT one… since mother can be
in the living room while toddler wandered off to check out the
bathroom. Before, it would be the
mother who walked away from the child to another location: now
the child can do that. There is
this new added experience and tension: come and go, come here,
go away, and "you" and "me".
Whoa. Quite something for a little one.
The sensory input and overwhelm can now be dealt with more in
interaction with the toddler,
than was possible with the physically inactive baby. The toddler
has more control over voice and
legs and arms. This can be used increasingly to help the child
reconnect with its center, to return
home to that sense of familiarity and security, and to help
release accumulated energies and
ground them. Doing this with mom helps a great deal, since mother
can act as a grounding
channel with her energies and the child's energies still being
so connected. Mother can ground
herself in her familiar way either before or after… and
that grounding can be either strengthened
or started by doing these things with the toddler:
1) Dance. Get out that sing-along CD/tape and sing together
while shaking those booties. Not
only does that get the coordination of left and right brain
hemisphere going (rebalancing the
hemispheres, enabling a more balanced flow of information between
them), the joined activity
reconnects mother and child, laughter releases endorphins (happy
hormone) which in turn helps
relax and feel good again about the Self. If you want to, toddler
can stand on the sofa or bed
while you stand on the ground to decrease the height-difference,
enabling mama to straighten out
her spine, and for eye-contact to be increased and facial expressions
to be more visible for the
toddler. By holding hands while dancing together, the toddler's
body can release excess energies
into the mother's hands. Mother's nervous system (physical and
energetic) is much more adept at
dealing with these energies that are already so familiar to
mother… After all, she is familiar with
the energies the child encountered, she's lived in them for
a good decade or two longer than the
child, and her nervous systems don't think twice about the energies.
Thus, they are instantly
neutralized… If there are energies the mother's system
is not familiar with, she will have plenty
of time after the child has become re-centered and rebalanced
to do a grounding meditation if
necessary.
2) While dancing will get the excess energies out of the toddler's
system, it might not be the best
thing to do every time. Sometimes the body is just plain tired,
and not up for anymore kinetic
activity. Then the mother can dance quietly with the child on
her arm, against her chest, cuddling
tightly to lullabies or familiar quiet songs. Doing this in
a quiet room, lights dimmed, little
external stimulation… will help the reconnection between
mother and child take place, and you'll
notice that more often than not, the child will increasingly
melt into you. The initial phase here is
to keep moving, and visualize your energies grounding, while
the kinetic energy also frees up
energies from the child. When the child starts to melt into
you, slow down but keep moving, until
both you and the child feel entirely together and cozy. Then
snuggle down somewhere together,
stop singing and hum a low tune (realigns the chakras for mother,
and reconnects mother with
her lower chakras, assisting with the grounding).
3) If you are still nursing, go for it. Nursing stimulates the
release of hormones (melatonins
among others) in the mother that help her rebalance, and the
sucking action stimulates the child's
pallet, the physical location where left and right brain hemisphere
can be accessed: helping
rebalance. The literal physical connection between mother and
child when nursing is such a
powerful way of re-establishing a balance and sense of togetherness
and that the world is once
again safe: the unit is together again. The scattered "thousand
and one things left to do" feelings
dissipate, just fall away. If you are not nursing, a bottle
or sippy-cup with a flexible spout will
help with these same things: when toddler feels better (surrendering
into receiving nurturing),
mama can relax, also stimulating the energy flow between mother
and child. The sucking urge is
nothing to be sniffed at… do not underestimate the child's
need to suckle, and the connected
sense of well-being and safety.
4) Have a bath together. Splish-splash. Get the bubbles out
so that movement is stimulated while
in the water. Also make space for some skin-to-skin contact,
snuggling together or massaging
while washing the child. Water brings you back to your body
and increases a sense of wellbeing.
The water envelopes and soothes. It doesn't only relax and cleanse
physically or
emotionally ; it also ionizes the body. A body loses its electrical
charge in closed buildings
(malls, office buildings, etc.), spaces with electronics (such
as computers, studios, etc.) in cars,
ferries, airplanes (Faraday cages), concrete structures and
spaces with Air Conditioning or
climate control. Sitting still for too long, not having fresh
air move past or not moving in fresh
air, will deplete the negative ions (electric charge) in the
body. Having a bath is a quick and
surefire way to help restore the body's electrical charge. Diffusion
of atoms naturally takes place,
and in the case of two bodies in close proximity a mother could
inadvertently deplete a child's
electrical charge, a child could deplete the mother's charge.
So enjoy the bath because it will help
you both come back to a recharged place (physically, emotionally,
spiritually). Another added
bonus of having a bath, is that any scent picked up from the
previous environment will be
washed off, and the baby will be much better able to recognize
mother's scent and relax,
knowing that mama is there, and the world is once again complete.
The bath doesn't have to be
more than ten minutes.
Afterward, take time to towel off, rubbing well. If possible,
use an unscented oil or body lotion
to massage the toddler. Or take the toddler on your lap, read
a story while massaging the
toddler's feet. All in all, this could take perhaps half an
hour, will rebalance the toddler, return
the child to a place of safety and comfort, and will either
be able to play alone again or nap while
you have some time for yourself. A pee *alone*, a cup of coffee,
and perhaps even a flick
through a magazine.
5) A very fussy toddler can be coaxed into a "yes-no"
game. Letting off steam by engaging in a
bit of voice play. You say "Yes". Since there is no
request from the child to elicit a "yes" or a
"no", the child will be surprised, and look for clarity.
Smile at the child and say "No". The child
has your attention now. Smile again and ask "Yes?",
and if the child isn't reacting verbally yet
"No?". When the child engages, take the opposite of
what your child says. And after two or three
yes-no-yes-no exchanges, suddenly use the one your child uses.
Your child will be surprised
again (again, has your attention) and will change it around.
Do this a few times… and make sure
to laugh at the fun of it. Encourage laughing… endorphins
help the physical release of tension,
easing grounding. The interaction between mother and child with
this amount of alertness will
re-establish the connection between the to of you again too…
through your close proximity, you
will be able to exchange more than words with your toddler:
excess energy is also exchanged
from the child to you, and you can once again ground for your
child.
6) If possible, use "monster voices". Opening up the
throat and making space for being "loud",
will also enable the child to release unnecessary energy. It
is okay to take up space physically,
emotionally and energetically if being loud is a game. If you
have an older child as well, perhaps
you could do a match of "who is loudest". Don't do
this with a baby around, for the sudden
loudness will startle the baby, making it alert again while
relaxation and centering is the goal.
7) A more technical way of rebalancing can be done with a "lazy
eight" or infinity symbol, an
eight lying on its side. The lazy eight connects the left and
right brain hemispheres again if one
of either hemispheres has been over- or under-stimulated for
a while.
With your hips, follow that lazy eight shape. Bring your pelvis
forward as far as you can, moving
to the left, and around to the back as far as you can, back
to the center (hips above feet again),
forward as far as you can, and this time to the right, around
the back, back to the center, etc. Do
this slowly, and between five and ten times until you feel a
center of gravity and balance within
yourself. You will literally regain your physical balance and
center point, and because you've
worked on maintaining your balance, you're also more grounded
than you were. You can
enhance this by first visualizing a big tree root coming from
your feet and anchoring you to the
center of the Earth. Your toddler can be in your arms while
you do this, and will be comforted by
the movement, or you can see if the toddler wants to join in.
You can also do this while visualizing a huge figure eight on
its side in the air. Stretch your arms
in front of you, and put the palm of one hand on the back of
the other. Now use the hands to trace
that lazy eight as far to the left and right, as far up and
down as you can while keeping your spine
straight, and your head still. Let your eyes go as far to the
top, bottom, corners and sides as
possible… you'll feel that there are tensions in the muscles
at certain areas. Pay attention to those
areas a bit more, they are the areas of your brain where things
have gotten blocked. So by
moving your eyes there, you will be able to release those too.
Your toddler will probably imitate
that arm movement, because it looks like fun.
8) March. Left, right, left, right, etc. Swing your right arm
while you lift up your left knee in a
clown-esque manner. Stomp heavily when the foot comes down again.
Again, the two
hemispheres are activated in a balanced way, stimulating a rebalancing.
The center of gravity is
quickly found again, and the body's sense of physical balance
restored. Stomping reinforces your
connection with the ground below you, with Mother Earth…
and the physical coordinated
activity restores metabolism and energy flow. Make silly lyrics
about the marching. Laugh.
Suddenly change direction, which requests alertness of your
child, and the surprise element will
tickle the toddler too. Have fun.
9) The element of Earth itself. Once the child feels comfortable
doing things alone again
(regained his center), allow the child to play with soil. Does
the child have an area in the garden
to dig in (or a bowl with sand on a balcony or on a plastic
sheet in the kitchen)? Direct contact
with the Earth is one of the best ways for a child to ground
naturally and often independently. A
child can dig in black soil for hours and hours... lugging it
around, digging, exploring
earthworms, ants...
10) Last but not least: Avoid sugars when the child is unbalanced
(either disengaged or hyper
active). The sugar will give the child a temporary burst of
energy, which ends in an adrenal crash
half an hour later… no fun for either mother or child.
(If the child is lacking physical energy,
protein will help restore the physiological need for energy.)
When you find your child is asking
for sweet products after a long day or a lot of stimulation,
check with yourself whether the child
is perhaps in need of grounding, since usually the available
energy of the child (physical,
emotional and/or mental) is severely depleted when it craves
sugars. You can bet that regrouping
time (reconnecting with the maternal energy source) is necessary,
and perhaps a bath and a nap
afterward…
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Libraries
are on this row
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INDEX
Page 3
(Main Section, Medicine Wheel, Native Languages &
Nations, Symbology)
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INDEX
Page 5
(Sacred Feminine & Masculine, Stones & Minerals)
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Text:
© Copyright: Cinnamon Moon & River WildFire Moon
(Founders.) 2000-date
All rights reserved.
Site
constructed by Dragonfly
Dezignz 1998-date
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